“A question that
sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?”
~Albert Einstein
I know, I know. I have said this many times before, but I finally think it's true.
I am going completely insane. Soon my sentences will be unbarable to even look at or write.
I don't know why I'm writing this either.
I don't know what to blame my loss of sanity on either, because we all know that you don't just go insane. That would be silly.
I want to say I blame the drugs... maybe the alcohol... or maybe it's the stress of school and friends and trying to find a job.
Maybe it's my family. Or the lack there of.
Maybe it's my mind that's broken, or this stupid book that is getting to me.
Could it be the music? CocoRosie might not be sane music, but it shouldn't drive me insane should it?
I can't stop thinking and it's scaring me. All I do now is think, think, think.
Sometimes I think I don't have any friends, sometimes I think I have too many. Other times I feel like I just need to fly away, like a flamingo. Fly away to some tropical place to get my thoughts straightened out, cause isn't that what the commercials tell us to do?
Maybe it's the fucking media?
They are everywhere.
Who knows, it could be my roommate.
Can anyone listen? Will you understand?
They never understand. It's me against the world, because that's what I'm meant to believe due to the media.
Fucking media.
I am going insane, I know it. Look at this blog post? Have you not seen anything more none sane?
I cry a lot now. I don't know why. I can't help it.
I can't sleep a lot now either. I don't know why. I just don't.
I wish I had motivation, but I don't.
I wonder what's wrong with me.
Oh yeah... I'm going insane.
XX
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